George (the employee): Knock. Knock. You wanted to see me boss?
Boss: Yes, George. Why don't you shut the door behind you and take a seat.
George: Is something wrong? You look down... oh no... you found out what the guys have been calling you around the office. It's just a joke man don't take it so seriously. But to be honest, it wouldn't kill you to wear a little extra deodorant if you know what I mean.
Boss: What? No, that's not why I called you in here. And what about the guys in the office?
George: Oh nothing, nothing. Anyways...the reason you called me into your office...?
Boss: Oh umm yes. Well you see George, the other executives and I feel that we need to make some changes around here
George: Don't tell me your getting rid of Thai Food Tuesdays?!
Boss: No George, we're not changing that. We were thinking of making changes more so to personnel.
George: Aha... gotchya...your looking to fire some people.
Boss: Yes, George.
George: Who is it? Is it Ashley down in Human Resources. You know I had a feeling she was gonna be let go soon.
Boss: Ummm, no. We were actually thinking of someone in the marketing department.
George: But there's only three of us down there. And you can't fire Steve. I mean, sure he disregards the dress code of Casual Friday's by still wearing a suit and tie, but come on, not everyone can be as cool as me and make every day Casual Friday. Plus, he's a good guy.
Boss: I know he's a good guy, but we're not firing him.
George: Then you're firing Bert? Oh God not Bert! How could you do this to him? The guy's been with the company for over forty years and this is how you repay him? I know he's old and all, but gosh man, have a heart!
Boss: George, I would never think of firing Bert, he's a great employee.
George: Well then why did you tell me you were firing someone in marketing? Grimaces. Ohhhhhh...I see what you're doing.
Boss: You do? Because I di....
George: Sure I do. You're getting me back for starting your nickname around the office. See, I told the guys you could take a joke. And you had me all worried that you were going to fire Steve and Bert. HAHA! Good one you old jokester!
Boss: ...
George: Well, it's been real fun man, but I have to go before all the good cupcakes in the conference room are gone. I'll catch up with you tomorrow morning. Actually I'll drop by in the afternoon, I'm thinking of sleeping in tomorrow. Anyways, see ya sweat-stains.
I love the conversation! It is so funny! I especially like how you created this persona for George which reflects through the whole conversation. His quirky attitude was portrayed really well. I could easily picture a person who acts just like that in office. I also really like how you tied the idea of "sweat-stains" from the introduction to the conclusion.
ReplyDeleteIts hard to find any criticism, but if there was anything you could work on more, it would be to emphasize why the conversation was so difficult for the boss. Just a single comment at the end could more clearly illustrate his frustration. Anyway, great job!
I really liked this a lot! You really developed Georges personality and stupidity. I especially like how you show reasons why he would be fired to understand the bosses perspective more. I also liked the use of elongated words with extra letters so you can hear the way that they would talk. If I had any criticism, it would only be that I wish the boss had a reaction after George left the room. I think that it would also be interesting to see the situation more, and maybe describing had gestures or facial expressions more could really help emphasize your points.
ReplyDeleteThis made me chuckle. I really liked the whole conversation and how the reader gets a sense of the entire company from what George says. George's persona was created very well through his speech as well, you did a great job with that. This would definitely be a difficult conversation to have. The only thing I would say that's negative is that the boss's reaction doesn't show through in his speech as much as George's. You can clearly visualize George, but the boss doesn't seem to have as much of a personality. The advice I would give is to make the boss's diction sound more aggravated and annoyed as George keeps talking.
ReplyDelete